Every morning when I wake up there's a brief moment where I think that it was a bad dream, that there is no way this could have happened, but then reality sinks in and I realize once again it was not a dream, that you're really gone. Every second of the day my mind is consumed with thoughts of you- every single memory running through my mind like a movie, hanging on to your every word. I can hear your laugh; I can see your beautiful smile. To see your smile one last time. I can feel you. I would give anything to hold you one last time, because had I known our last hug would be the last time I would have never let you go. To hear your voice one more time. To hear you say, "Hey sis." To exchange one last, "I love you." I know you knew how much I loved you, just like I know how much you loved me.
I think about the time that has been erased. You were only twenty-eight. A full life ahead of you. Selfishly I wish we had more time with you. I think about all the things we're going to miss out on. Your wedding day, your housewarming, your children's birth, all the things I had hoped for you and that you were working towards. I know those were your dreams too because we talked about one day our children growing up together and how we would share our memories of our mother, their grandmother and of Judy our foster mother. We had dreams together and those dreams I grieve for too.
My wish for you is that you are free of pain, you are free of suffering, and I hope you are at peace. I know you have joined many loved ones we have lost, and I hope you feel all the love and support you so much needed and wanted. I can see you and mom reuniting and it brings me peace knowing you are with her and Judy. Your memory will live on in all the memories you have gave us. We will share those memories. You touched the lives of so many people, you were loved by so many. You will be missed by so many, please know you made a difference in many people's lives. I love you Tyler, until we see each other again.